in some families it is real and palpable
the affirmation and commitment to the family
the honest reminder that no matter what,.... there is a place for you here
and you are in our hearts.
so I as the grandparent say "I love you" and you in return say " I love you too"
and sometimes the roles are reversed and it is I that says "I love you too"
my words to you are heart felt
sometimes with slight tear of emotion
And I hope you know it is real.
I hope you know it is not the "god bless you" to your sneeze
nor the "your welcome" to my "thank-you"
words so important should not be a societal norm
should not be an automated response
but alas we are a society of rules and norms
and after my dad tells me I'm here only because he grunted in when he should have pulled out,
it is time to turn in for the night and he says "I love you" and I reply with the well rehearsed line "I love you too"
and on the way out the door to school, even though there was a 3:am, the parent says "I love you" and the dutiful child replies "Love you too"
after the lovers break up sex the well rehearsed lines;
"hmm l love you" she says
his reply, a tired with an almost bothersome tone "Love you too"
Insecurity of relationship almost forgotten.
And as the adopted child utters the reply
desperately trying to believe
believe the words coming out of their mouth
those magic words of "I love you too".
wanting to believe in their power
power of loving families
where through the anger and the chaos
through the disappointment and frustration
the day ends with "I love you too"
and it is real and palpable.
but the hollow, empty, lonely,
soul-shattering feelings of not being wanted so over-shadow the words
The words become dutiful and meaningless.
